Dear Ostad Jalilzadeh, I thought that it could be interesting to say something about the defense mechanism that everyone use in his daily normal life.
We know that the aim of a kung fu ka is to become whole, as a person and as a martial artist, and knowing ourself is the first goal that is adressed when we study Anattawa, that we know that means “you”. We are the point of start of everything, good or bad, in our life. So knowing ourself is the first step on the path of developement.
In Psychology it is well known that there are a number of defense mechanism , number that is quite large and divided in more primitive to more matures, that get activated in order to allow us to keep a feeling of “wellbeing and safety”, namely to protect ourself from what may threaten us.
I must specify that this threat may not be strictly physical, but also psychological. We have a body and a mind, so the threat can be dangerous for our health, or for the image that we have of ourself that built the “Self”, or from an affective point of view too. Remember please that we are adult and well grown up, but all of us had been little baby and every threat to be separated from our parents meant at the time a threat to the survival, and when we grow up this message remain well imprented deep in the core of our unconscious mind.
So the threat may be both phsycal or psychological, and it will affect our defense, so that they will be risen up.
Anna Freud defined in detail the defense mechanisms sketched out by her father Sigmund in her book, "The Ego and the Mechanisms of Defense."
Some of the most common defense mechanisms are:
Denial. When you use denial, you simply refuse to accept the truth or reality of a fact or experience. Utility of this defense comes from the fact that denial can prevent from incorporating unpleasant information about yourself and your life and have potentially destructive consequences.
Repression. You might forget an unpleasant experience, in the past, such as a car accident at which you were found to be faulty. You might also use repression when you "forget" to do something unpleasant such as seeing the dentist or meeting with someone you know and you don't really like.
Regression. When we are heavily under pressure and stressed we might go back to a childlike emotional state in which your unconscious fears, anxieties, and general "angst" reappear. That road rage you see when drivers are stuck in traffic is a great example of regression. The problem with regression is that you may regret letting your childish self show in a self-destructive way. Driving badly or refusing to talk to people who've made you feel bad, mad, or sad can eventually get you in worse trouble than what you had when you began.
Displacement. In displacement you transfer your original feelings that would get you in trouble (usually anger) away from the person who is the target of your rage to a more harmless victim. Any time you shift your true feelings from their original, anxiety-provoking, source to one you perceive as less likely to cause you harm, you're quite possibly using displacement.
Projection. To understand this mecjhanism you have to start with the assumption that to recognize a particular quality in yourself would cause you psychic pain. This quality get split from your conscious mind and will be projected on the world. For example, let's say you're worried that you're not really very smart. You make a dumb mistake that no one says anything about at all, but you end up and accuse others of saying that you're dumb, inferior, or just plain stupid. You are "projecting" your insecurities onto others and in the process, alienating them.
Reaction formation: Converting unconscious wishes or impulses that are perceived to be dangerous or unacceptable into their opposites; behaviour that is completely the opposite of what one really wants or feels; taking the opposite belief because the true belief causes anxiety.
Intellectualization. A form of isolation; concentrating on the intellectual components of a situation so as to distance oneself from the associated anxiety-provoking emotions; separation of emotion from ideas
Rationalization (making excuses): Where a person convinces him or herself that no wrong was done and that all is or was all right through faulty and false reasoning.
Sublimation: Transformation of negative emotions or instincts into positive actions, behaviour, or emotion. (ex. Playing a heavy contact sport such as football or rugby can transform aggression into a game)
This are only some of the defenses we use in our daily life, there are a lot more that goes from more pathological and regressed, to those more mature that help us to integrate conflicting emotions and thoughts. Those who use these mechanisms are usually considered virtuous. Humilty, gratitude, acceptance, tollerance are some of them and many have their origins in an immature stage of development. They have been adapted through the years in order to optimise success in human society and relationships.
But when does we feel the need to defence ourself? To feel the need to do it we need first to process a stimulus that is coming from outside and to encode it as a threat. Doing this require a number of psychological processing.
I will simply say that to encode and decode the reality our mind use some mental structures that are stored in our memory and formed along the years and that made up our semantic system.
If we have not have had any kind of experience in a particular field, we will never be able to recognize and decode a message that is carrying a meaning that we are not structured to percieve.
So for example, to recognize a thief we need to have get to know the concept of stealing, we must have had experience (direct or indirect) of it. In the same way, to recognize someone as a loyal friend we need to have get to know the concept of loyalty.
The path to know ourself in deep is then to take a look at how we see the world, searching inside ourself the features of the world we are seeing in front of us, to lower down the defense, recognize our limits and to let go the image we have of ourself to have it back enriched.